Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Postpartum Depression

You know, I've been seeing quite a bit of stories about a parent, usually mom, killing their baby. It breaks my heart. It breaks my heart for sooooo many reasons. #1, I wish somebody saved that poor child! I also feel for the parent. Not always, but usually, it had to be due to ignored PPD. It was either ignored by the parent or a close loved one. If the parent "ignores" it, it's because they are scared of being judged. Scared their child will be taken from them. They also truly believe they would never hurt their child. The people close to them just don't understand how serious this type of depression can be. 

I can say this from experience. I'm lucky that I did have people I was comfortable talking to. People that understood I was a mother that loved her child with all of her heart. When I was pregnant with my 2nd little angel, I was scared. Scared as hell. I knew I couldn't go without professional help. I didn't know before getting pregnant again that it would most likely be worse on the second round. I also was dealing with my son, whom I've said before, is more than a handful. I was dealing with his out of control tantrums, night terrors, worrying about his tics & the fact that he stopped talking for a year @15 months. Anyway, I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. Long story short, I started therapy & went from there. Best thing I ever did.

I also want to mention that I know it's easy for loved ones to "ignore" that you need help. Everytime I told my husband I needed help or that I was scared, he told me I'd be fine. Said I wouldn't do anything stupid. That's the thing. Nobody usually thinks they are capable of harming someone. Forget about that someone being your beautiful child. The sad thing is, is that you DON'T know that. Go for long enough under enough stress on not enough sleep, you can snap. All it takes is a few seconds. You snap & don't even know what just happened.

I remember before becoming a mom how I wanted to burn these mothers at the stake. Now I hate that nobody listened or they didn't reach out. It breaks my heart. Not even to mention these poor kids!!! Ugh!

OK, I'm done. I'm done for now. It's just sad. I swear my next post will be more on the positive side;)

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